Running

Why do we run away from what we most want?

We must first admit we are running away. And then maybe we’ll figure out what we really want.

Me- I want everything. I don’t want to miss a single person, place, or experience on this planet…or any other planet for that matter. But I must learn to put mind over matter. The same mind that knows what it wants is the one that has absolutely no idea what it really needs. And this mind wants one thing today and another completely different (fabricated) path the next.

How is there enough time in this lifetime to feel all these experiences? (How many lifetimes are there?)

So rather than choosing one, I choose them all. And then I effectively proceed to self-sabotage all of them, one by one. Because I don’t leave any actual space for digging deep into any ONE thing. Is this really FOMO (fear of missing out), though? Or is there a deeper (obviously a well I didn’t consciously dig) issue at play here?

Am I running from what I REALLY want?

Are all the people, places, and experiences manifestations of the same longing? What am I missing? What is the essence of the hole I’m trying to fill?

I really want to know what this is….but first, I have a trip to plan.